4/27/2022
A definition of mindfulness that we use in the Mindfulness Center is “intentional nonjudgmental present-moment awareness with kindness”. Why is there such an emphasis on paying attention to the present moment? Because every moment we experience is a present moment. Our lives unfold in the present moment. When the past occurred, it was in the present moment. When we think about the past, we are doing it in the present moment. The same is true of the future. Viewed from this perspective, all our experiences are in the present moment. It is easy to get caught up in wishing we could change something that occurred in the past. Obviously this is not possible, yet we can expend a lot of energy wishing we could.
3/25/2022
Spring, a season of renewal, has arrived. Renewal can mean to be renewed: to make like new; to restore to freshness and vigor. This spring has an added sense of renewal as we emerge from yet another Covid surge and hope once again that this may be the last. Spring can provide an opportunity to find ways to restore freshness and vigor to our lives. We might slow down to really notice what is occurring in the natural world, becoming aware of changes in the weather, of flowers or trees blooming, of the sounds of birds. We might take this opportunity to renew relationships with family and friends, especially those that may have been affected by Covid. We might renew our commitment to practicing mindfulness, perhaps setting aside time to meditate regularly.
Mindfulness and Emotional Intelligence Part 3
2/24/2022
Two recent Musings have been devoted to mindfulness and Emotional Intelligence (EI). EI refers to the ability to understand and manage our own emotions, as well as to recognize and influence the emotions of those around us. EI has been shown to be a powerful predictor of work performance, is an attribute of successful leaders, and can also be important in other settings. There are four main components to EI: self-awareness; self-regulation; social awareness; and relationship management. Relationship management is the topic of this column, and refers to using the awareness of our own emotions and those of others to optimally manage interactions. There are a number of competencies that contribute to relationship management in Daniel Goleman’s model of Emotional Intelligence.
1/24/2022
A new year has begun, one in which many of us hoped the COVID-19 pandemic would be behind us. Instead, we find ourselves in another surge, with more people having become infected than ever. Fortunately, illness caused by Omicron, the current predominant strain, seems less severe than prior variants. Despite this, because so many people have become infected, healthcare facilities are once again stressed, and those who work in them are having to care for more patients than ever, often with fewer staff due to healthcare workers becoming infected themselves as well as the number of people who have left the field during the pandemic. The amount of suffering caused by the pandemic has been and continues to be profound, affecting those infected by the virus, those caring for those who were infected, and those whose lives have been impacted in so many other ways.
12/13/2021
We all went into this pandemic together. Quarantine, washing hands, wearing masks, experiencing profound fear, increasing anxiety, showing compassion all became a collective consciousness for many of us. News reports flashed from around the world of people in isolation, trying to make the best of it. “Some Good News” with John Krasinski, videos of Italians singing from balconies, folks in NYC cheering on healthcare workers, photos of loved ones outside of nursing home windows waving to relatives locked inside were all broadcasted this time last year. Now that the pandemic dynamics have shifted with vaccine success, we are attempting to return to “normal” which has been anything but normal! Re-entry has been a solo experience for many of us, with each of us re-entering at different times and at different paces. This experience has felt isolating at times with new feelings of unexpected loneliness. In addition, feelings of uncertainty have arisen as we have tried to navigate this new normal, adding more stress to an already stressed-out baseline.
Mindfulness and Emotional Intelligence Part 2
11/22/2021
In last month’s Monthly Musing, I wrote about the relationship between mindfulness and the first two aspects of Emotional Intelligence (EI): self-awareness and self-management. These provide the basis for the other two components of EI: social awareness and relationship management. The former is the topic for this month. Social awareness refers to paying attention to others, especially their emotions. Being aware of others emotions is central to empathy, which has been defined as the capacity to understand and share another person's emotional experience. Empathy is the principal competence underlying social awareness, and can be cultivated by both paying attention to others when we are in relationship with them, really listening, and also paying attention to what we are feeling when we are in the presence of others. When we give someone else our full attention we can better connect with what they are feeling.
Mindfulness and Emotional Intelligence- Part 1
10/28/2021
Emotional Intelligence (EI) refers to the ability to understand and manage our own emotions, as well as to recognize and influence the emotions of those around us. EI has been shown to be a powerful predictor of work performance, and can also be important other settings. There are a number of models of EI. Perhaps the best known is that developed by Daniel Goleman which contains four domains: self-awareness, self-regulation, social awareness, and relationship management (https://hbr.org/2017/02/emotional-intelligence-has-12-elements-which-do-you-need-to-work-on). Emotional intelligence is based in self-awareness, in being aware of emotions as they arise. Mindfulness is key to doing this: when we are mindful, we are paying attention to our present moment experience, including recognizing emotions.
9/27/2021
Each of us is constantly changing. Many of the cells in our bodies turn over every day, with old cells dying to be replaced by new cells. The molecules that make up the cells and fluids in our bodies are also being exchanged. Our bodies today are composed of many different components than yesterday. Our brains are also changing. New neural connections are being established and old connections are being pruned. This even happens in the memory centers in the brain. Our memories are constantly being altered with new information added and details changed. Despite these constant changes, we may tend to think of ourselves as being fixed, and we often try to hold on to a construction of a self that is solid and immutable.
Mindful Eating: An Effective Method for Generating True Health and Happiness
8/18/2021
“The Weight-Loss Industry Is Coming for Our Post-Lockdown Bodies”. This was the title of a recent New York Times article in which the author outlined ways in which the multi-billion-dollar diet industry is devising new tactics to persuade us to buy products that promise quick weight loss and happiness. The problem with restrictive diets and weight-loss products is that, while they may bring about rapid weight loss, they are not sustainable. Most people regain the lost weight and return to mindless eating habits. Furthermore, the weight loss industry seduces us into believing that weight loss, at any cost, is the path to achieving happiness. Worse, they teach us to distrust the very best tool we have; ourselves and our own awareness of what our body wants and needs.
The Benefits of Practicing Awareness When Rushing
7/23/2021
In coming out of a pandemic where life slowed down a bit, have you noticed now all the rushing? How much we rush through life, getting on to the “next” thing? Hurrying through, while attempting to take care of something else? My mother hung a quote on the kitchen wall, “The hurrier I go the behinder I get.” Research seems to indicate this is probably true. Excessive hurrying ends up in worrying. For example, if you are in a fast-paced job and you need to get home at a certain time, you may find yourself hurrying through your day. Yet later, you may find yourself worrying when you get home. Worrying about missing an important detail? Now you find yourself spending more time at home re-checking your day’s work.
